Raising Cain

I was watching one of those early morning shows today, and I heard something that really made me angry. They were doing a segment on children with autism. The segment itself was inspiring, first that someone is talking about autism and also that people are trying to be innovative in their approach to dealing with autism. What got me angry was listening to a young boy (probably about 9-10 years old) talking about going to a "regular" class so he wouldn't get bullied. He said, "maybe they bully me because I'm in special ed." I know that bullying has been around for a long, long time. As a boy, I was on both the receiving and the giving end of bullying. The problem is that our culture has so bought into the myth of violence and supremacy that I think we are actually encouraging bullying, at least tacitly. But, the damage done to young men and women because of bullying is a stain on our national consciousness. As parents, we need to teach our children that it is not o.k. to bully other children. It is that simple. Schools will always do their best, but the sheer number of children involved makes it very difficult to monitor. Parents, we must take responsibility. Teach our children real values, values that give life. My five year-old son has been taking karate for a few months and he really enjoys it. My wife and I struggled with whether or not to let him join the class. I spoke with his sensei, and the students in this class learn as much about cooperation, self-respect and respect for others, as they do how to defend themselves. Those are values that, as parents, we can support. I think my rant is done. Let's just stop this nonsense.

If you would like to read about this topic as it relates to boys (I am sorry, I do not have a book about girls and bullying, but I am sure that they are out there), pick up "Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys" by Dan Kindlon and Michael Thompson.